I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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