Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
