it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize