Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just threw up on my dentist
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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