Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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