Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
