Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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