C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
