hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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