he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Operation Purity has been aborted
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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