Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
