Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
