I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
