Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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