Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
