It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
