I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
