Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
