I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
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