This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
