I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
