id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
