It's Friday. Sex?
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
