fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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