Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize
