therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
