Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
