drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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