This girl is more easily done than said...
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
