I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
His nipple licking is glorious
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