he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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