Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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