We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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