Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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