Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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