I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
