One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
