New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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