Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
