She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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