You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
