champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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