do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize