How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
