Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Your topless pictures make me question reality
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
