Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
