Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
