Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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