she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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