Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
