So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
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